This photo reflects just how I feel today. I’m swimming in a large pool of aspiring independent authors and no one can see me. Or maybe that’s been my whole life and I didn’t see it until I started writing. But, here I am! The gold one with the black eyes!
Since I have never been sixty-five before, I’m just assuming many people my age are wondering what they really did with their lives? It all went by so quickly. I can say I have a great daughter and two wonderful step-daughters. An accomplishment many women do not achieve. After achieving that everything else in life is pretty much icing.
Will it really matter if I never save the world? What would I be saving it from and how would I save it? I think I gave up on changing the world when I was about twenty. Too much to change. Then I went on to live another forty-five years to add to my stress. I may not have changed the world, but I changed my view of the world.
I learned you can’t make people love you or even like you. I stopped worrying about that a very long time ago. I didn’t say it doesn’t hurt my feelings when I find out someone doesn’t like me. I’m saying I just don’t hang on to that hurt. I’m a pretty awesome being and if you don’t like me, then it’s your loss. You missed out on a relationship with someone who can make you laugh in the darkest hours, or at least bring a smile to your face.
I learned no matter how crowded the pool is, keep swimming! It doesn’t matter if you make it to the front to lead. What matters is that you don’t sink to the bottom. I have been at the bottom of the pool a few times and it wasn’t fun. Swimming back to the surface wasn’t much fun either but once I got my head above water, life was good. Just being in the pool is a wonderful thing.
I keep on swimming everyday. I may not achieve much forward movement on certain days but my head is above water. I may not see upstream too far but I’m not at the bottom looking to the surface. And who knows, one day I might make my way out of the crowded large pool into a serene pool.
Until then, paddle, paddle, paddle.